Listening: Saturday Afternoon - Claudio Baglioni - 1975

When I woke up, the dinosaur was no longer there... I mean, my master was not in the room. I sat up in bed but couldn’t get up; my left hand was secured with a shackle to a chain that, in turn, was fastened to a leg of the bed. The sun was pouring in strongly through the closed window and the air conditioning was off; it was very hot. The room smelled of sweat and sex.

My master had the courtesy to order some sandwiches from room service, and now they were within my reach, resting on a tray along with a beer and a handwritten note. “I won’t take long, Xoxo, rest and eat something to regain your strength. You’ll need it tonight. A kiss, Your Macho Warden.”

I noticed that the laptop was no longer in its place. He must have stepped out for some work-related issue. I anxiously bit into a sandwich. It was good. But the beer was warm. Damn, it was hot! And I really had to pee.

Fortunately, the remote control for the TV lay on the nightstand. At least I could entertain myself. I turned on the device; an indicator showed the time, 5:25 PM. I spent a while browsing channels and decided to stay on the one that provided 24-hour news.

- “An important raid took place this morning in Madrid, in a private club for hardcore sex. In a joint operation by the National Police and the Civil Guard, several notable figures from finance and high-ranking officials have been arrested, who, apparently, were running a criminal organization dedicated to drug trafficking, money laundering...” On the screen appeared the image of D. Roberto - with the subtitle “Roberto Gonzalín, president of Gonzalín Bank.” And then the effigy of D. Andrés, “Andrés Galindo, Undersecretary of Diffuse Affairs.” “According to sources from the Anti-Corruption Prosecutor's Office, the operation is still ongoing in several provinces and blah, blah, blah...”

I was frozen in place. Was it a coincidence or did we have something to do with that? I decided not to think too much. But I was alone, bored, and worried. And what if D. Carlos had also been arrested? He had probably left the “Do Not Disturb” sign on the door. And I didn’t want to create a scandal that would harm my master. On the other hand, I was about to burst.

I tried to pull the chain with all my might, but it was firmly tied to the bed leg. And when I leaned over that way to check, I discovered a plastic bag on the floor with another note. “This is in case you have to pee.” It was an adult diaper. A cautious master is worth two. So, I put it on and let loose my bladder. Very good, because the diaper absorbed everything without wetting the sheets. But very bad, because now my lower abdomen was a swamp of murky waters. The stifling heat, the chain, the dampness in my parts, the cage, the warm beer... It was a whole set of irritating circumstances that my master had meticulously prepared...